Unspeakable Consequences
by EternallyEC
Summary: Set in late 2005 or early 2006. After finding out about the Cris secret Natalie makes a mistake that has horrific, unspeakable consequences. I'm really bad at summaries, please read and review!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but the concept; all OLTL characters and trademarks belong to ABCD.

**Author's Note/WARNING:** This fic deals with NCS (non-consensual sex; aka RAPE). It's not described hardly at all but it's very much implied.

**A/N2:** I should also mention that I've had this idea for probably three months now and finally started writing it last month. I've just now finished part 1, so I'm not sure how long part 2 will take--but Dulce's fic made me want to go on and post this. Maybe my muse being fed will help me out!

**Dedication:** Not that I think anybody particularly wants this dedicated to them LOL but I would be very remiss not to mention my Mandy (who turns 21 this Friday! Happy birthday!) because she read it over several times and declared it fit for posting the night I originally posted and then helped name it. I love you sis!!!

**Title: **Unexpected Consequences 1/?

Natalie walked out of the hospital feeling dazed and numb from the news she'd just received. Barely able to make it to her car, she knew that she was in no condition to drive and instead began to quickly walk towards the pier and its' welcoming darkness so that she could begin to process the news in peace.

John was leaving the hospital after a quick follow-up appointment on his hand when he saw her. Natalie was pale as a sheet and had a look in her eyes he couldn't remember ever having seen there before. Rushing to his car, he started it and pulled out onto the road intent on following her and making sure everything was okay.

Natalie had only just made it to the cool darkness of the pier when the hot tears began pouring down her cheeks. She held onto the wall as she sobbed, trying to figure out what she was going to do…

John parked the car and quickly went in pursuit of Natalie. After a few moments he heard what sounded like sobs coming from nearby and followed the sound until he turned a corner to see Natalie clinging to a wall and crying harder than he could ever remember seeing her cry. "Natalie?"

Natalie froze at the sound of his voice and immediately took a deep breath, trying to calm herself as she quickly wiped her face as best she could. "Yeah?" she said, finally turning to face him.

He frowned as he saw the tear tracks on her face and the total despair in her eyes. "I was leaving the hospital and saw you… You looked like something was up."

"I'm fine."

"Yeah, this," he gently brushed away a stray tear rolling down her cheek, "really helps convince me of that."

"Look, it's not a big deal really—"

"Natalie, look. It's me. You can tell me anything, you know that right?" She nodded weakly. "Okay. So what's going on?"

Natalie looked at the ground and then back at John. Taking a deep breath she decided to take the plunge. "Okay…. It started the week after I found out about Cristian… I wasn't handling it well so I drove to the bar a few miles outside of town to have a few drinks. Well one thing led to another and pretty soon I was drunk. I'd been talking to a guy since I got there and he hadn't had anything to drink so he offered to give me a ride home in my car.

"When I got home he made the point that he didn't have a car or any way to get back to it so I invited him in to call the cab company but he somehow talked me into sitting on the couch and just talking for a while.

"That was when it all started."

"_You are one hell of a woman."_

_Natalie smirked and rolled her eyes. "And how would you know? You only met mea few hours ago… you don't even know my name."_

"_You don't know my name either but you let me into your house."_

_Natalie felt a twinge of unease at his remark and unconsciously moved away from him a few inches. "So what is your name?" she asked, trying to sound nonchalant._

"_You tell me yours and I'll tell you mine."_

_She shook her head and folded her arms over her chest, her AC girl instincts coming out in full force. "I don't think so slick. Either you tell me your name or you can get out of my house."_

"He told me his name was Thomas… For some reason that made me feel safe. I don't even know why." Her breath caught in her throat as she looked at John and realized that was a lie. As her eyes met his she knew that he had recognized the connection as well.

"I told him my name was Jessica… I don't know why but I didn't think I should give him my real name. And that feeling makes what I did next seem even stupider than it was…

For some reason after a little bit had passed I thought it'd be a good idea to get out a bottle of wine…"

"_Good year," Thomas observed, reading the label on the wine bottle as Natalie handed him a glass._

"_You know wine?" Natalie asked, settling back against the couch and taking a sip._

"_A little bit. My kid brother is in the wine business so I know a little bit about it."_

"Suddenly I looked at the clock and it was three forty-five in the morning."

"_Whoa."_

"_What?"_

"_Check the time," Natalie told him. "You have to go."_

"_Why?" _

"Suddenly I couldn't remember why he needed to go and while I was trying to think of a reason he kissed me."

_Natalie pushed Thomas away and slapped him, wiping her mouth disgustedly with her other hand. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"_

"He didn't answer, just smiled and kissed me again. And… even though I knew it was wrong, even though I knew that I would hate myself for doing it… I kissed him back."

Natalie looked at the ground, unable to look at John and see the disappointment and disapproval she knew would be in his eyes. The tears began to fall faster down her face as she re-lived what had happened next…

"So we kissed," she whispered, "and then he leaned me back onto the couch. At first it was all okay… but then he unbuttoned my jeans."

"_Whoa." Natalie half moaned as Thomas kissed her neck and unbuttoning her jeans. "Stop, you have to stop."_

"_Why?" _

"_Because I'm not the kind of girl that has one night stands and I'm not about to start now," Natalie told him, pushing against his chest and trying to make him move._

"But he wouldn't move…. And he wouldn't stop," Natalie said in a choked whisper.

"_Honey, one thing you should know about me," Thomas drawled, looking down at her with a smirk as he slowly and deliberately pulled the zipper down on her jeans, "I don't tolerate teases."_

John shut his eyes tightly as a wave of emotion overcame him as the full implication of what she was saying hit him. "Are you saying—Natalie, are you saying this guy raped you?"

Natalie nodded, but she didn't feel like that was enough so she said, "Yeah. He raped me."

Saying the words out loud suddenly made the nightmare real, and she let out a whimper as she began to collapse to the ground, her tears coming faster and harder than ever.

John caught her gently in his arms and went to the ground with her as he hugged her to him. She whimpered, trying to push him away and he let her, having dealt with enough rape victims to know that close physical contact after re-living the event was often too much for them.

Even as his arms ached to pull Natalie to him as she wept John forced himself to retreat a few inches away and settle for lightly stroking her hair and whispering comforting words.

After what seemed like forever to both John and Natalie but in reality couldn't have been more than half an hour Natalie wiped her tears away and went into John's arms. He breathed in the scent of her hair thankfully as he gently stroked her back, making sure not to hold her too tightly.

"That's not all," she whispered against his shirt.

John tightened his hold just a little bit. "What else?"

"I'm pregnant. That's why—that's why you found me the way I was."

"Natalie…"

"You don't have to say anything… Just hold me John."

Speechless, John pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head fiercely. He didn't know what was going to happen next, but he did know that he was going to be there to help Natalie every step of the way.

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. Chapter 2

My muse has been working hard on this... Hope you enjoy the over-sappiness of this chapter and I'm gonna try my best to keep the muse a-moving!! Got one more chapter after this but then I must get started on chapter 4!

**Chapter 2**

A month had passed since Natalie had told John about the rape and her subsequent pregnancy. It had taken him just a few short hours to convince her to tell her family and file a police report, and she couldn't believe how much better she felt as soon as she had confessed to everyone what had happened. It was like the burden of what had happened had been lifted from her shoulders and she felt a wave of overwhelming peace sweep over her.

John, true to his word to himself and Natalie, had not left her side the entire time and her entire family was wise enough to not to comment on it. Instead they chose to smile at him gratefully and steal the moments he was away from her to thank him profusely for being there for her.

"Hey babe, what you thinking about?" Natalie asked, walking into the bedroom and interrupting John's reverie.

"I was just thinking about you and our munchkin," he replied with a soft smile that she returned.

"You know, I just can't tell you enough how much it means to me that you would do this."

"Do what?"

She smiled and touched her stomach lovingly. "That you would claim this child as your own. There aren't many men that would do that John--especially not after the way I treated you."

"Hey." He stood up and walked over to her, gently smoothing a stray strand of hair back from her face and cupping her cheek. "You had every right to be pissed with me. I never blamed you for that; actually I expected and deserved a hell of a lot worse than what you gave me." Placing his free hand on her stomach he continued, "And as for this baby--he or she _is _mine in every way that counts."

Natalie's eyes filled with tears and she stood on her tiptoes to press a sweet kiss against his lips. "Thank you," she whispered.

John pulled back to look at her, a soft smile on his lips. "I love you," he murmured, his smile widening at her sharp intake of breath.

"John..." she whispered, her eyes filling with tears.

"Shh," he whispered back, pressing a finger to her lips. "Don't say anything… I've made you do all of the talking for too long." He winked at her and she laughed through the tears that were now spilling down her cheeks.

"The truth is... I was scared. I've been scared since the day that I met you because I felt the connection between us and it was stronger than anything I'd ever felt before… I wasn't ready for that and I couldn't help but feel that I was betraying Caitlin…"

His voice trailed off and Natalie reached down to take his hand in hers, giving it a comforting squeeze and earning a pained smile. "So what changed?" she asked.

"You did." He lifted their joined hands to press a kiss to the back of her hand. "After you came down on me the first time we almost… Well, I realized then that it was time to let Cait go. I wasn't sure how to do it and it took me a long time but finally I did."

"And by the time you did…"

"Cris had come back," he finished her sentence. "Skipping all of the bad memories, when we finally almost made it work this last time after Hayes… I was so close to being able to tell you the words. I was going to tell you the truth about Cris and my feelings when I got home from visiting him the next day and let you decide what to do."

"But you never came home… You got stuck in the riot."

"Yeah, and you had to find out about Cris the worst way possible…"

"I survived," she told him, brushing her tears away with the back of her hand and squeezing his hand tightly. "And so did our connection and my love for you."

Smiling gratefully at her, John leaned in and kissed her. "I love you."

"I love you too," Natalie said with a small grin. "I'm glad we finally got this talk out of the way--and I can't tell you how much it means to me that you are finally ready to do this the right way."

He placed his free hand on her belly and smiled. "I don't think I have much choice… I don't ever want to hurt you again and I don't ever want to hurt this baby."

Natalie let go of his hand and wrapped her arms around John's neck, pressing her lips against his in what started out a gentle kiss but quickly turned into something more.

They never could have known as they reveled in each other and their newfound intimacy that their troubles were just beginning…

TO BE CONTINUED


	3. Chapter 3

I apologize for the evil cliffhanger!! I think this may go for longer than 4 chapters LOL--but I'm enjoying the ride! Hope you guys are too!

**Title:** Unexpected Consequences 3/?

"Do you have to go meet your sister?" John asked as he lay in bed and watched Natalie getting dressed.

She smiled as she pulled her shirt over her head and flipped her hair out of the collar. "Yes, she said it was urgent or I would reschedule. I'll be back as soon as I can."

John watched as she walked into the bathroom and quickly brushed her hair, never knowing just how sexy she was to him in that moment. She never knew that if her sister hadn't been having a crisis of some kind he would have stood up, walked into that bathroom and--

"I'll be back soon," Natalie told him, leaning down to brush a gentle kiss across his lips.

"Okay. I love you."

Her face lit up and she replied, "I love you too--and I am never going to get tired of hearing you say that."

"Good, because I ain't going to get tired of saying it."

She giggled and walked out of the room, leaving John with a big smile on his face.

Natalie walked into the diner and sat down at her and Jessica's usual booth. She checked her watch and sighed, Jessica was late as usual. She ordered them both coffee (hers decaf, of course) and pulled a book from her purse.

"Sorry I'm late," Jessica's voice interrupted her reading a few minutes later. She closed the book and smiled as her sister sat down across from her. "It was a crazy morning."

Smiling, Natalie shook her head. "Forget about it--I already ordered our coffee. So spill--what's the crisis call about?"

"Okay, well last night we were all relaxing on the couch watching TV when somebody knocked on the door. It turns out that Nash has an older brother he's neglected to mention who decided to just drop into town for a visit."

"Wait a minute--Nash has an older brother? How do we not know this?"

Jessica shrugged. "I don't know. I mean, we've talked about our families a lot so I just don't understand why he's never mentioned this guy to me."

"Have you asked him yet?" She could tell by the way her sister looked at the table that she hadn't. "Jess! You need to go home right now and talk to him."

"But--"

"No buts. Go!"

Sulking, Jessica mumbled a 'fine' and stood, grabbing her coffee from the waitress' tray as she stalked out the door.

The waitress sighed, obviously irritated. "Great, as if I don't get enough money taken out of my check for the broken coffee cups."

"I'm sorry," Natalie said, reaching into her bag and grabbing a notebook and a pen. Is Carlotta here?" The waitress shook her head and Natalie scribbled a note for her ex-mother in law and tore it out, handing it to the waitress. "I'm sorry about my sister--hopefully this will help you stay out of trouble."

"I hope so, I can't really afford to lose any more money. Will you be having anything else?"

Natalie shook her head. "No, but would you happen to know if this is the decaf?"

"It is," she said. "Can I get you anything else?"

"No, I'm fine," Natalie told the waitress and she walked back to the counter. With a sigh, Natalie took her book back out and began to read as she drank her coffee.

"Honey, I'm home!" Natalie called out as she walked into John's hotel room, slipping her jacket off and throwing it on the couch. "Are you here?"

"Hey," John said with a grin as he walked into the living room, greeting Natalie with a kiss. "I missed you."

"And I missed you," she told him.

"So what was Jessica's crisis this time?"

Rolling her eyes Natalie shook her head. "Nash's brother showed up at their door last night--"

"Nash has a brother? Did Jess know that?"

Natalie shook her head. "And that would be the reason behind the crisis meeting. I sent her home to talk to him about it."

"Sounds like it was the best idea. So Ms. Buchanan, what do you have planned for the day?"

"Absolutely nothing, Mr. McBain. Why?"

"Well I was just thinking--don't I owe you another dance?"

Natalie smiled and her eyes were sparkling with happiness as she replied, "You know, I believe you may be right. When did you want to go?"

"Well, I was thinking maybe we could find something to do for the day and maybe go someplace tonight."

"Tonight?"

John grinned as he watched Natalie's smile get even bigger, he hadn't thought it was possible. "Yeah, tonight. Maybe at UltraViolet?"

She couldn't believe that John McBain, the man most against public displays of affection that she'd ever met, was talking about taking her to a crowded club on a Saturday night to dance with her. Her eyes misted over and she said softly, "I'd love that."

John smiled and gently ran his thumb over first the left and then the right eye, wiping the moisture from them. "Good, because I want everyone to see us together and know that I'm the luckiest man on Earth," he whispered, kissing her gently.

Natalie kissed him back with all the passion and love in her soul, unable to find the words to tell him how much she loved him. As they stumbled back towards the bed all John and Natalie were concentrating on was making each other feel just how much they meant to each other…

"I'm going to put Bree down for her nap," Jessica snapped, storming out of the kitchen and ignoring the stranger on the couch. She picked Bree up out of the playpen and headed for the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

Nash followed her out of the kitchen but collapsed onto the couch beside his brother instead of going after his wife. "Next time you decide to just show up at my door, think you could call first?"

"Sorry man, I found your name in the phone book--I didn't know you were married and had a kid."

"It's not your fault, I moved and never told you where. You couldn't have known. So what does bring you to Llanview anyway?"

"A girl," Mark told him, his eyes finding the picture of Natalie on the mantel and studying her closely. "What else?"

TO BE CONTINUED


End file.
